Saturday, April 9, 2011

Books n books

Whew, it's been awhile. All the movin' and marryin' and then movin' again really wears a girl out. I've just been laying on my couch, my fingers too frail and weak to type out a blog post. Really sad story. But my strength has returned, and THANK GOD, because I have some special things to share.

I love to used-book shop, and lately I find myself gravitating to the how-to books. I don' t need anymore stories, thanks, I just need to know how to make plants grow, get food delicious, and sweaters all knit up. My personal favorite genre for these types of books is "Hippies Doing It For Themselves". What can I say. I'm just a hippie and I want to do it for myself.

I will now share some pictures of some of my recent finds. I found a houseplant care book in Idyllwild that, well, it has this:
I know. I know. And the book tells you how to make that inconceivable looking terrarium. It does not, however, tell you where to buy that necklace.

It also tells you how to propagate ferns, and that shit? Is koo-koo nutty. THEY OOZE OUT OF PRIMORDIAL SLIME F'REALS.

Speaking of realness, I also just got a bread baking book that's pretty serious. No jokers here:

ALL THIS BREAD IS SO REAL WE PUT A REAL ASS PHOTO OF BREAD ON THE COVER. It's a pretty awesome book, the directions are more, "This will probably work, but if it doesn't, don't cry, just slap another loaf on the table, bread's a tricky little bastard" than artful photos of beautiful bread loaves rising on the table in farmhouse kitchens that make you feel bad about yourself. I made a sourdough starter this week, and I have HIGH hopes about my future self eating some homemade sourdough.

Downside is that inside this book is less real ass photos and more whimsical little drawings that, well, don't always illustrate the actual intent:

This little girl freaks me out whenever I see her. STOP SMILING LIKE THAT AT ME. And this little bear looks like it's cheerfully eating his own leg with some honey and I DON'T LIKE IT

Finally, let's talk television. Now that this post is almost over, what's next for your life? Let me help:

Downton Abbey-English servants and manor lords just living life. And Dame Maggie Goddamn Smith, so do yourself a favor and get into it.

Friday Night Lights- High school football players in Texas? YOU'RE GODDAMN RIGHT. I dare you to watch the first episode and not tear up a little. If you don't, then you're probably a robot that wasn't programmed to love. Watching that episode will likely be the way we weed out replicants in the future.

Bob's Burgers- This show has H. Jon Benjamin, who I would watch talk about paint drying he's so awesome.


Ilan S. said...

Those illustrations are truly frightening, Rochelle. When you come up and visit you should bring some homemade sourdough bread! Glad to see I successfully pressured you into blogging again.

wirledpeas said...

I do not know this Ilan S. fellow, but I am in support of anyone who pressures you into more of the above. SO MUCH AWESOME.